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A strength-guided, goal-oriented approach to the positive growth and 

development of people and services.





You are welcome to print, copy, photocopy, email, post to a website, link from your website, place in a magazine or newsletter or otherwise distribute these articles in any fashion freely. 


Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW



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1 Depression/Anxiety: Two Brief Explanations about Medication Two brief videos to explain important informatino about anti-depression/anxiety medication
2 Child Behavior Problem? Assess first. Treatment second. Here's how....
3 A Better Relationship is Only a Lesson Away Therapy is about developing a more constructive set of skills.... 
4 Six Helpful Strategies for Life After Rehab This may be the difference between success and failure.

Tinder Babies and the Hook-Up Generation

This brings the consequences of the one night stand to a whole new level....

Relationship Advice – Spotting the Dangerous Narcissist

The behaviour you see direscted to others, could be directed to you....
7 Narcissistic Partner? How to manage or leave. Strategic thinking is key - here's why...
8 Even Counselors have to Survive Persons with Narcissistic Personality Disorder As much as our clients need to survive narcassistic partners, counselors must sruvive their many narcissistic clients.
9 The Dementia Edition This contains the two next articles in a single handout.
10 Coming to Grips as the Memory Fades


Counseling facilitates both coping and management of mind altering changes for both the person who is undergoing change and those others whose lives are also affected. 
11 Coming to Grips as the Memory Fades, Part II – The Three Biggies Chief among other issues are anosognosia, confabulation and disinhibition.
12 The Six Strategies of Subtle Emotional and Psychological Abuse If your partner is driving you nuts and you can't figure it out, this may help.
13 Adult Bullies Not a pleasant experience for anyone, including myself....
14 Ask These Four Questions When Choosing a Couple Counsellor You may wind up choosing this person to help you separate...
15 How Well Do You Truly Know Your Kids? Recent survey says....
16 Parenting Guts Do you have what it takes to parent? And just what does it take?....
17 Lop-Sided Relationships and Depression   Giving with nothing in return leads to depression....
18 Shame, Complicity, Intimidation What keeps sexial abuse secret...
19 Sexual Abuse Counseling Your therapist should be comfortable discussing this with you... This 3 minute video explains
20 Child Behaviour Problem? Start with a Bio-Psycho-Social Assessment
21 Understanding and Treating Depression Key things you need to know about depression and treatment.
22 Narcissists in Relationships

Are you in a relationship with someone you think is a narcissist? 

This may explain your situation. 

23 Considering Marital/Couple Counselling? Convincing your partner is half the battle...
24 Coping with Adversity We all face it at some time in our life, but then what?
25 Depression? But what treatment? Depedning on the underlying issue, treatment will differ...
26 The Age of Sexual Exploration Reach out and touch someone takes on a whole new meaning for kids today...
27 Retiring from your own business? We call it succession/exit planning…. It took an array of porfessionals to get your business this far, now to change or wind down, it will take these porfessionals...
28 What’s up with the Silent Treatment? In these instances, silence is anything but golden...
29 The Five Best Friends of the Abusive Man Abusive men walk among us and this is how they go about meeting thier needs....
30 Five surefire signs you need couple counselling The time to look for help may be sooner than you think.
31 Is It Safe Did your counsellor make sure marital therapy was safe to attend BEFORE you arrived?
32 Cross Cultural Conundrums  Being from different places brings different adjustments.
33 Valentine Gift Renew the Woo!
34 Don’t Focus On Your Child’s Happiness! There is something more important to concentrate on...
35 Jump the Pond Realizing and then escaping unsuitable living conditions....
36 Multiculturalism In The Daycare Setting What do parents want?
37 Down Syndrome Adjusting to the news is half the battle and there support... 
38 Resolving The Cycle Of Abuse What keeps you hooked in?
39 Pre-Marital Counseling In View Of Abuse It may be time to delay the wedding...
40 Verbal Abuse Oh yes. Words can hurt. Deeply.
41 Remembering Family Traditions The push and pulls of family expectations....
42 Couple Counselling Should you be seen together or separately? What if abuse issues?
43 Working Parents And Child Development Is work getting in the way of taking care of the kids?
44 Sexual Obsession? Stay away from the porn.

Too much porn can bring conflict to your relationship. 

Here's how and what to do about it.

45 What’s That You Say? It just may be a hearing loss underneath that concern...
46 Major Depression and Family Not only does the individual need support but the spouse and children too...
47 Good and Bad In view of abuse, assess your relationship on the bad...
48 Thinking of Counselling? Make sure the service provider is matched to your needs...
49 Alcoholic? Quitting is only the beginning. Now address the thinking and behaving...
50 Marital Therapy Explained The ins and outs of marital therapy on one page!
51 Sexual Obsession?  Step away from the porn. Are you being asked to go beyond your comfort level?
52 ADHD Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: Assessment and Treatment...
53 Drug abuse: Marijuana and Alcohol From use to abuse to dependency...
54 Treating Teens Who Abuse Drugs/Alcohol Strategies from intervention to treatment

Kids with Special Needs and the Role of Early Childhood Educators

The role of the ECE is special and here's why...
56 Happy Holiday Season Depends on Family Financial Planning Strategies to manage the financial crunch and Christmas expectations...
57 Hooked on Video Games Video game addiction is real and may require professional intervention...
58 Newlywed Boundaries: Holidays and Children Defining yourselves as a couple, separate from your own families...
59 Issues for Immigrant Parents and Their Children Parent/child conflict in the context of adapting to a new culture...
60 Moving... again! Multiple moves can affect the children...
61 The Words Inside Your Head What you tell yourself influences your behaviour and feelings....
62 Marital Tips List A guide to surviving and thriving in marriage....
63 Sexual Abuse Counselling by Family Physicians If you provide sexual abuse counselling, this may be helpful...
64 When Your Child “Comes Out” How will you handle he news?
65 The Happy Alcoholic Still Creates Problems Even an alcoholic with a good mood creates problems for family and children
66 Distress In Cross-Cultural Marriages Remember the loud talker or even the quiet talker in the Seinfeld show...
67 On Children, Family Life and Future “You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.” Kahlil Gibran
68 Healthy Eating for Kids Strategies to improve kids eating habits...
69 Challenging Teens Wayward youth? Engage them...
70 Your children are listening and sometimes watching too. What do you do when a child tells you their parents fight?
71 Understanding Is Not Enough Misbehaviour cannot be managed by understanding alone.
72 Psychological Abuse No bruises, big hurt, difficult to escape... Here's how.
73 Self-Help vs. Professional Help There's a big difference!
74 Active or Passive Counseling? Which is better depends upon what you are looking for.
75 Teen’s First Job Chores at home and support in job hunting helps land the first job...
76 Secular counselling isn’t always enough Conflict with God or faith? The help you need may be from your clergy or religious leader...
77 Someone really really difficult to get along with?   This person may have a personality disorder... Read more!
78 Happiness won’t save you if the pond you are swimming in is polluted. Alcohol use and corporal punishment don't mix
79 Make Amends Even if you waited until the very end, still consider doing it for your legacy.
80 The Long Arm Of Domestic Violence If you think we aren't all affected by domestic violence, then read this!
81 Frustration Teaching your kids to manage frustration is in their interest... Here's why...
82 Your Past Matters Kid out of control? Maybe how you were parented factors in.
83 Choosing Mr. Right Strategies for mate selection!
84 Bless the Coach Let them do their job and let sportsmanship rule the day!
85 Conflict of Libidos Your drive may be different, but this doesn't have to be a deal breaker....
86 Therapy? Yes, but what type? Be sure to discuss your problem with the therapist BEFORE setting an appointment..
87 My Child is Odd Hangs out with the adults, class clown, bullied, uses phrases or humour but inappropriately...
88 Out of Control and Pseudomature Teens Hang in... change is a rough ride and starts with the parents....
89 The First Few Years Of School Is your young child having problems at school?
90 Issues in Determining Learning Disabilities Learning disabilities aren't always obvious. Sometimes, you have to dig deeper...
91 Marriages On The Cusp Counselling may always be of service, even if the marriage fails...
92 Parents: Invest in your relationship Recharging your batteries gives you more energy to parent the kids...
93 Save your money and get on the floor It's not the toys that count, but your amount of play time together...
94 Rebuilding Trust Do you know how long or what it takes to rebuilt trust when broken? This article holds some clues...
95 When isn’t child sex play just sex play? Do you know the difference between developmentally appropriate sexual play and inappropriate sexual behaviour in children?
96 Am I Fat? How would you answer if your child asked?
97 The Pre-Marital Toilet Test This one question before marriage could determine how long it lasts...
98 Drinking and Parenting Do you know how much can lead to trouble?
99 Sibling Harmony Versus Rivalry Don't confuse different developmental stages for lack of love...
100 Ah, Newlyweds… then reality sets in. Getting used to each other? Here's what to think about...
101 Effects of Exposure to Domestic Violence From Childhood to Adult Life Domestic violence affects children in the present and in adult life. Here's how...
102 Assessing Change Not sure if therapy or treatment is working? Here is how you figure it out...
103 Need help parenting a teen? Are you a parent or a friend? It makes a world of difference in managing behaviour!
104 When a Child With Special Needs and Complex Disabilities Surfaces with Behaviour Problems Where do you start?
105 On Coping with Death… Children grieve too. Here's how...
106 Affairs Are About Anything But Love Don't kid yourself and worse, don't compromise your integrity...
107 Parents can help prevent teen driver car crashes Parents! You are the path to the keys...
108 Who's In Charge Anyways? Grandparents, parents, children... Making it work when living together...
109 Living with Abortion An abortion is an event in time, living with with the decision lasts a lifetime.
110 Childhood Sexual Abuse and Adult Intimate Life It starts with understanding and education, then permission...
111 Assessing and Managing School-Age Children with Behavioral Problems Get it right because getting it wrong only makes problems worse. Here's how...
112 The Granddaddy of All New Years Resolutions All others pale next to this one...

Sibling issues when one has special needs: Am I my brother’s keeper?

How do you support siblings whose brother or sister many have special needs?
114 Parental Guilt and Kids with Special Needs Some parents experience severe guilt for the special needs of their kids. Let's take a look at it...
115 The Impact of Formative Experiences As we learn, so shall we do... but not necessarily.
116 But He’s an Angel at Home Does your child get into trouble at daycare or school, yet is good at home? Consider this...
117 Check the Pulse Before Pulling the Plug Divorce doesn't have to be inevitable. There may still be some life in the marriage.

Children and the Aftermath of Katrina: From fear to hope

Key strategies can encourage adjustment and hope.
119 Build Rapport to Facilitate Teen Behaviour Teen out of control and consequences rising - what's a parent to do?
120 Tethered By The Electronic Umbilicus Do you connect with your kids through the relationship or electronic devices? The relationship works better. Here's why...
121 Will Your Kids Be Of “Good Character”? Learn the two secrets to raising kids of "good character".
122 Guiding Principle Follow this advise and lead a life of feeling good.
123 Stepbrothers Teach Their Parents Things change, adjustments needs to be facilitated. Here's one good one for the books!
124 Hitting hurts. So does exposure to it as a kid Exposure to domestic violence is harmful to children. This article explains...

(Domestic Violence - PowerPoint Presentations)

125 Married Boomers Face Their Own Perfect Storm Do you know the three major life events that can take a toll on your marriage if hit all at once?
126 Marital Therapy? Marital therapy requires specialized training, distinguishing it from family therapy and individual therapy.
127 Think Your Teen Needs Counselling? Exasperated parents of teens see counselling as a way to help. However, parents are advised to meet with the counsellor first. Here's why.
128 Which Dog Do You Feed? Managing behaviour is a little like feeding dogs. Here's how...
129 Bribery vs. Reinforcement Parents are right. Bribery does not work. However, reinforcement does. Here's the difference...
130 Good Teens Start With Good Beans Growing up kids to become good teens is like making coffee. Here's how it works...
131 Check Ingredients Before Blending If you are a separated parent who is seriously dating, consider these points to ease your children's adjustment before marriage or cohabiting

Instant Messaging - get with the program

Parents are worried their kids spend too much time "chatting" on-line. Here's my advice.

Counselling: Knowing your options

You've decided on counselling, but do you use private or public services... EAP or third party benefits? This article explains the differences.

Preschooler Behaviour:

Who's the Boss

Some preschoolers learn to manipulate their parents feelings to get out of doing as they're told. Here's what to do.

Sexual Abuse Counselling

Sexual Abuse Counselling can help! 

This article explains what's involved.


Is your 8 – 10 year old boy/girl crazy?

Want to know what to do?

Depression: Youth, Counselling and Antidepressants

As if parents didn't have enough to worry about if their teen was depressed, now they have to worry about the effects of medication. This articles discusses the role of medication and counseling in treating depression.

Listen to a 20 minute discussion on Teen Depression

(Adolescent Anxiety and Depression - PowerPoint Presentation)


First comes love, then comes marriage…

Do you know the stages to a successful long-term relationship?

My Partner is Alcoholic. Can you help?

This article discusses 5 stages to recovery and challenges to sobriety.

Finding Joy in Your Children

Managing children means more than control or discipline. It includes joy. This article describes the use of joy to rekindle or maximize parent-child relationships.
141 Joy – Survey and Results This link takes you to the survey and replies on which the above article is based upon.  There are some great examples of ways to find joy in your children. 
142 Appreciating Developmental Milestones This article explains what is meant by developmental milestones and why the concept is important. The article is well suited to parents of preschoolers and early school age children.
143 Internet Safety and Children This article describes warning signs for Internet misuse and prevention strategies.
144 Home from University A tongue in cheek article about kids returning home from first year university.
145 Thinking of an affair? Then think again. This article describes the impact of affairs on loved ones and offers practical advice before having an affair.
146 Tantrums getting the better of you? Sure kids protest, but how do you handle the behaviour in the two to three year old? This article offers suggestions.
147 A Brief Synopsis of Child Sexual Abuse from Onset to Adult Life This article describes the process of childhood sexual abuse and impact on child, then adult functioning and concludes with how to help.
148 Safe From Strangers Child abduction is every parents nightmare. This article offers thoughts and tips to help keep children safer.

Do You Have a Wholesome Family?

This article summarizes a survey to define a wholesome family and offers tips to become one.


Terrible Twos

This article offers advice on understanding and managing the behaviour of two-year-olds.


Catch a Kid Doing Good

This article reminds us of the importance of noticing good behaviour.


Choose How You Parent

Remembering how you were raised can help you make choices with how you raise your kids.


Four Tips To Self Esteem In Children

Like the title says... Four tips to self esteem...


Golden rules page

Taken from my book - tips to remember...


Holiday Excitement

How to manage the behaviour of kids through holiday excitement.


Is your teen drug dependent

Would you recognize if your teen uses drugs. This article may help.


Leaving the nest

Leaving home... the nice way.


Let them remember their behavior

Tips for effective discipline.


Parenting Teens

Check out the difference in parenting teens vs. the younger child.


Raising Responsible Teens

Monitoring your teen is a good thing... Do it like this.


Recipe for a Healthy Child

Bake a kid? Here's how to bake a good one.

Self Esteem vs. Self Righteousness

So what's the difference?

Check it out...

163 Tips for the Best Father's Day The title says it all!


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